The Lord has really been challenging me hard. I realize more and more how weak my faith is. I laugh that at one point in my life I actually thought I was good at that ‘trusting’ thing. Good at not worrying about stuff. Good at giving everything to God and not taking it back.
But when you hit a place where you’ve been giving something to the Lord for so long – you keep telling Him you trust Him completely – you wait for His answer with confident expectation – and yet it seems to drag on and on. And so you wonder again. What is the Lord’s plan? What is He trying to do? What is He going to do? And you give it back to Him. Over and over again. And you feel guilty.
I’m sure He loves to hear you come to Him and tell Him that you know He’s got this. You trust Him completely. You don’t doubt Him for a moment. That His way is best! And yet, here you are are saying it again, and you realize that somewhere, you are struggling to make the things you believe without a doubt, become a reality in those deepest places of your mind and heart.
Do we really believe He is worth abandoning everything for? Do you and I really believe that Jesus is so good, so satisfying, and so rewarding, that we will leave all we have and all we own and all we are in order to find our fullness in Him? Do you and I believe Him enough to obey Him and to follow Him wherever He leads, even when the crowds in our culture, and maybe in our churches, turn the other way?
– David Platt, Radical
I listened to these words today. These were the words that got me to thinking and realizing that no matter what I’ve said, the changes I’ve made, the ‘different’ that I already am, is not enough. You might wonder what it has to do with trust? It’s in the leaving ‘all that I am, have and own in order to find my fullness in Him.’
What I realized today is humbling. And it’s personal. And it’s embarrassing. But the truth is, we are all human, and the struggles I deal with are not new to me. I think just maybe someone else could relate to this. What I realized in a BIG way today, is that I thought that I was already living a radical, sold out life to Christ. And maybe, in a way, some would say I was. But, I realize that in determining that I was living a radical life, was that I was comparing what I was doing, how I was living, to others. Not intentionally. But, I was. It doesn’t matter if other people looking at my life would consider it to be ‘radical’. It doesn’t matter if I am little more ‘sold-out’ or ‘different’ than anyone else! And you know what? I realized that just leaves a subtle door open for pride to seep in. It’s only pride that would look at others to tell whether or not we are ‘radical’.
What did Jesus Christ say about what obedience? What did He say being a follower looks like? Because, unless we are living like Him, we cannot claim to be, in any way, a sold-out follower. If we want to compare, we only have to look at Christ’s life to know what we need to be. And the truth be told, I realized today that I am a little (or maybe a little more than a little) afraid to really be more radical! There are already plenty of people who think we’re over-the-top. Plenty of people who criticize or stand against us. And the more ‘radical’ we become, the lonelier it could be. When a person in the Bible asked Jesus what he needed to do to become a follower, the answers Jesus gave were pretty radical! And if, in following Him, others would say that we are ‘over-the-top radical’, because they would say that about Jesus as well, then I guess that would be the highest compliment they could give!
Here’s Jesus’ words:
…whoever of you does not forsake all that he has cannot be My disciple. Luke 14:33
And he who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me. Matthew 10:38
And there you have it.